So, I’ve decided that:
(1) I’m not a ‘real’ cutter because I don’t [usually] cut more than twenty times at once. And because I don’t go deep enough.
(2) I don’t have an eating disorder. I eat too much (especially lately). Diet sodas and vegetables were still a lot of food in some cases. Plus, I could stop. I could. It’s just something I’m toying with.
(3) Personality disorder? Lololol. No. I don’t have one. My ‘symptoms’ are just personality flaws. I’m impulsive and self destructive and moody. That’s just who I am.
(4) I sure as hell have never had hallucinations. I’m just overdramatic as fuck.
(5) I AM NOT FUCKING OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE. How many times do I have to say that for someone to understand that? Yes, I eat weirdly, certain number of bites/chews/size of bites, and I do get hung up on sets of three in everything I see, but that doesn’t mean shit.
(6) I am completely fucking normal. I really am.
Breakfast - Skipped.
Lunch - ¾ cup Gatorade Rain, Berry Flavor = 38
Dinner - 1 cup macaroni pie, 1 1/2 cups Gatorade Rain, Berry Flavor, 1 large banana = 595
Other - 1/2 cup oatmeal made w/ soymilk plus and sugar, 1/2 cup V8 Splash, 3 cups water = 365
Harm - None. 18 days.
i won't let you say goodbye, and i'll be your reason why.
Hon...
ReplyDeleteYou'd say I know you well, right?
Well, i'm telling you, that you should tell whoever is telling you that to STFU. And if it's you telling yourself that, then you should tell that part of you that you're wrong. Even if you don't fully believe it. Because, I know you, and those things you just wrote, they aren't true. I'm not telling you this just because, I'm not bullshitting you. Also, that 'you don't see me in real life so how could you know' isn't true, and you know that, as the same goes for me.
and i'm asking you to trust me.
I love you.
Take care, Hon.
-hugs-
Also, 18 days? Holy cap love, proud of you! :D <3
ReplyDelete<3333
ReplyDeleteI love you so fucking much.
Oh, and you know you never have to ask for my trust, right? Even if my head argues, I'll listen to what you say. <3
First off, I meant crap, not cap. Buuuuut I think you know that. 'Cause you speak Tigerspeak. 8D
ReplyDeleteYeah, I know I don't, but sometimes it helps to say it, 'eh?
Love you so much <3333