Whenever I begin to get close to someone, I always keep a bit of distance. Even when I really am close with someone, there is always a film around me, a plastic sheet keeping me safe. Protected from everyone I love. The Friend and Dakota particularly.
But with one person, I don't have that anymore. At first, being known, truly known, felt kind of raw. Exposed. But then that was okay.
Closeness doesn't feel the way I thought it would, not completely. It's not always warmth and softness and happiness, though there is plenty of that. Mostly it's feeling every emotion she has. Anger, pain, fear, and when I can ease that there's this glow I feel. It sounds corny and stupid, but that's what it's like. No protection needed from her. Safe. Calm.
The way it happened isn't like I thought either. There was no moment we mended, but rather stitch by stitch came through the day and months and now I suppose it would be years.
It's okay now.
[do you like how i rant about you on my blog?]
But with one person, I don't have that anymore. At first, being known, truly known, felt kind of raw. Exposed. But then that was okay.
Closeness doesn't feel the way I thought it would, not completely. It's not always warmth and softness and happiness, though there is plenty of that. Mostly it's feeling every emotion she has. Anger, pain, fear, and when I can ease that there's this glow I feel. It sounds corny and stupid, but that's what it's like. No protection needed from her. Safe. Calm.
The way it happened isn't like I thought either. There was no moment we mended, but rather stitch by stitch came through the day and months and now I suppose it would be years.
It's okay now.
[do you like how i rant about you on my blog?]
lovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelove.
ReplyDelete...that is all.
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I love you too. <3 Obviously, xD. But I love you a buuunch.
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